An American Abroad

Bangkok 4

There are a lot of roundeyes here–farangs, in the local parlance. Many are tall and blond. It takes me a whole day to stop being astonished when I see them. I now understand the behavior of the Shenzhen group at the Kunming airport a little better. I hear Scandinavian tongues, German, and Aussie-accented English. And I soon conceive a distaste for my fellow travelers. They’re too tall, too hairy, too fat, too old, too numerous, too rich. Many of the guys have their arms draped over the shoulders of Thai women. I’m no prude; my resentment isn’t rooted in moral scruples. These temporary-girlfriend relationships are mutually exploitive, and so what? No, it’s the aesthetics I object to. Thai women are indeed beautiful, graceful, and sexy. The western men tend toward the lumpy. It’s like seeing a beautiful painting in a cheap and ugly frame.

(Ahead to Bangkok 5)

(Back to Bangkok 3)

Comments

  1. It is easiest to see sexual attraction as being normal and beautiful if it matches our own desires.

    Women (and men) who are most attracted to thin, elegant, smooth men are happy with the men almost anywhere in Thailand. But what about those women (and men) who prefer big, tall, hairy, gruff looking men? They can move to the tourist area and find a job entertaining visitors.

    And since those visitors are probably in Thailand because they like small, thin, elegant, and smooth women (and men) everyone is enjoying their mutual attraction.

    I might even posit that Thai women and men who love Western looking men have been moving to the port cities for centuries. Their offspring may very well share their ancestor’s tastes.

    Don’t think I’m knocking on you because you are straight and white. I saw your magnificent Gilbert and Sullivan Kim Davis parody. I know you are an ally.

    I had this very same conversation with a trans gender woman and several gay men when a young, very handsome, muscular soccer player had just came out. They expressed revulsion because he had an older, fat boyfriend. I pointed out many gay boys grow up being afraid of never finding love, of losing their family if they do fall in love, and feeling physically unsafe among their peers. When those boys start dating a big, older, established, and confident gay man can be very attractive. He is a man who won’t just love you, but can also protect you. That is almost an aphrodisiac to some young men.

    And if you are older, established, confident and single, why not have a young beautiful boyfriend?

    • Thanks for the love on the Gilbert & Sullivan / Kim Davis parody. Glad you liked it. It was fun writing it.

      I’d never second-guess sexual attraction. You can’t eff the ineffable. And I do find Thai people in general to be more tolerant and accepting of different body types, different appearances, and different appetites than Americans are. I appreciate your sharing a perspective I hadn’t considered.

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