Five years ago today, I changed my life.
In the 19 months before that, I’d lost my marriage, my job, my home, and my gall bladder. I was on the shady side of 50 and acutely aware that the time remaining to do the things I’d dreamed of doing was growing shorter with each day. I was tired of feeling paralyzed by inertia and my own apprehensions.
So on this day in 2013, I sat in a departure lounge at the Detroit airport waiting for a plane to China.
I thought of backing out. I told myself that none of my friends would think any less of me if I left the airport and headed back home. But when my flight was called, I stood up, got in line, handed the gate attendant my boarding pass, walked down the jetway, and boarded the plane.
That the first day of my new life and I was traveling on a one-way ticket.
I spent a year living and working in China. That experience led me to Tunisia, where I lived for the better part of a year. After that, I returned to the USA, but left again last August for my current home in Puerto Rico.
The photo below shows me in 2013, 2014, and 2018 in China, Tunisia, and Puerto Rico, respectively.
Along the way, I used my foreign homes as bases from which to travel regionally. I visited Hong Kong, Vietnam, Laos, Cambodia, Thailand, Malaysia, Bangladesh, Sri Lanka, Turkey, Morocco, the Dominican Republic, Curacao, and Panama.
Living as an expat taught me self-sufficiency, resourcefulness and patience. It showed me what it is to be a racial, ethnic, and religious minority–for as Robert Louis Stevenson said, “There are no foreign lands. It is the traveler only who is foreign.”
I took major steps toward becoming the man I’d always wanted to be. I met wonderful people around the world whom I call my friends and am still in touch with. My experiences simultaneously fed my curiosity and left me longing to see new horizons.
The expat life was not without difficulties. I had visa problems in China. I was robbed in Tunisia. I had to flee Puerto Rico to avoid Hurricane Maria. Still, I see these events through the lens described by Yvon Choinard, the mountain climber who founded Patagonia sportswear: adventure is what happens when things stop going according to plan.
My expat and travel experiences also led to my rediscovery of love and a life that I now share (though not often enough) with my darling Lori. That wasn’t part of the plan—and it may prove to be the greatest adventure yet.
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